Help With Your Mother's Rule

Help With Your Mother's Rule is a forum for women who want trouble-shooting help with their Mother's Rules or about any aspect of the 5 Ps of the married vocation.

Ask Holly: This blog is composed of your questions. Contact me at the address listed on Holly's Helpers page and I will respond. Please share your unique ideas as well. The more ideas and experience we share, the more successful every mother will be in designing her own unique Mother's Rule.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

When Nothing is Helping...

Dear Holly,
I just have to take a minute to thank you for MROL - your book has been life-changing. The story of your life seemed so similar to my own. I was raised a Catholic and went to Protestantism when I thought they had something I didn't have. I have dealt with health issues for which no cause can be found but I always feel sick and have no energy, and I am always dealing with slothfulness and an inability to focus. I see so much that needs to be done that I don't do anything becuase I don't know where to start. I also fooled around with the ouija board as a teen. I homeschool and it has been only by God's grace that my children are succeeding because I switch curriculums constantly as I can't stick with anything. It's almost like I want someone to tell me what to do and use because I just can't seem to do it myself. Even with different healthy diets, I can't stick to them for more that a couple of weeks because I just don't know what I should be doing. Nobody else seems to have these problems and your book was the closest I've ever come to feeling like I had a kindred spirit. I'm always looking for an answer but I can't find any. Just recently I've returned to the Catholic faith because I figured I had tried everything else and this was the only thing left that I hadn't tried. I'm glad I did this but it's not helping. I'm also having trouble with devotion to the Blessed Mother-it just dosn't seem right to pray to her when I can pray directly to God. I'm desperate--any advice and prayers would be most coveted.
Posted by at 7:51 AM
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8 comments:

  1. I most certainly sympathize with your personal plight. As you know, I too have experienced much of this.

    I do think you need to talk to the Blessed Mother about things - Jesus is the one who gave her to us. Not talking to Mary is like saying, it's not right to talk to your children because it could offend your husband.

    Remember - Protestants call prayer, worship. We use the word prayer in many ways as Catholics - in relation to praying to Mary, it only means 'talking to', not worship. Rest your fears on this.

    If you look on my website
    http://www.mothersruleoflife.com/2010/03/why-consecrate-ourselves-to-mary_8091.html
    This tries to explain to you how Mary works, without in any way insulting the Lord, In fact, it honors his wishes. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you how.

    I do know this. Sometimes the Lord permits us to look and look, but we also need to accept the answers when they come our way. Remember the Old Testament story about some guy, Naaman, who wanted to be cured of leprosy, and when the prophet told him to go bathe in the river, he got mad and walked away? His servant , I think, convinced him to obey the Lord's instructions. Naaman had been looking for a difficult answer, a certain answer, but he was not open to the real answer. When he finally gave in to God's Will, he was cured.

    I think you have made a huge step in coming back to your Catholic faith. But I think, for your complete healing, you need to trust this Church you have returned to and do as She recommends - and that starts with you trusting the Lord in relation to our understanding of Mary.

    Since Mary was so instrumental in my healing, since the Lord Himself places her as our mother at his Crucifixion (and you know what they say about the dying wishes of someone... how there is never a lie in it), then you need to simply ask the Blessed Mother to guide you to Jesus (she won't do otherwise) and to lead you to your healing.

    Additionally, you will be helped very much over the next little while if you attend Mass and receive the Eucharist, and get to confession. Another thing you can do is pray for guidance about a priest you can talk to. One thing I do know - Catholicism has the Lord's power available through the sacraments and the priesthood.

    And if you want to get truly faithful and open to God's Will, begin a daily rosary for your healing. There is a promise to the rosary: "You will receive all you ask for through the recitation of the rosary." I have lived this, I have benefited from it, and I attest to it's truth. I will pray you take a chance with the door the Lord is asking you to walk through... you have nothing to lose, do you?
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  2. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone! I have experienced exactly what you are going through. My health issues were greatly debilitating to our homeschool and general well-being and peace of the household. I do not intend to bestow medical advice, but I will share with you what is working for me.

    I started charting with the Creighton Natural Family Planning Model and, with the aid of my pro-NFP doctor, discovered that I was low on progesterone. Once that was taken care of, I was still experiencing some cycle-related symptoms, and it was discovered that I had some thyroid imbalance as well. I'm currently going through a relatively new therapy for my thyroid issues and so far it seems to be helping. Time will tell. I encourage you to look at NFP charting, if you are not already, to see if your health issues may be related to your cycle. So many of the problems with our bodies can be covered up with birth control pills or anti-depressants when there are real, underlying causes that can be helped through natural means.

    I would also offer a book to you that has helped me immensely: Consoling the Heart of Jesus by Michael Gaitley. I have been a life-long Catholic, but no book has brought me closer to Jesus, and by extension His Mother, than this book. This book is about the unfathomable Mercy of God which frees us from the bondage of sin, attachments and weaknesses. The Mercy of God takes the focus off of ourselves and places it where it should be: on Jesus Christ, and that love that grows for Jesus overflows to our family and neighbors. This book not only helps us to come to know the Mercy of Jesus, but helps us embrace it as well.

    I pray the Holy Spirit will inspire me to think of you often, and you will be in my prayers.
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  3. Holly, a question about something in your book that also relates to this post. You both dappled in the occult when young. You mentioned that deliverance prayer helped. What exactly is this? I know it's not full on exorcism, but is it something 'OK' with the Church? When I was at a high school sleep over, someone suggested we do a seance. Nothing 'happened' but years later I find myself wondering if I opened myself to something diabolical by participating even tho' there was an element of innocence. Have you heard or read much about this?
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  4. You are right - it is not exorcism. It is simply prayer, usually by a priest, normally one who has experience in this type of thing, but not always. I would always consult a priest for this type of thing, both to 'diagnose' and to 'pray'. Our imaginations can run away with us, and the priest has the power of discernment and Christ's special graces to minister to their people.

    Of course, prayer is always 'OK' with the Church. Especially when done through her ministers.

    Usually occult games, videos, reading, etc all can open the door to occult interference in a person's life. Confessing this can help. If you notice any particular burden in your life that persists, especially in relation to emotional difficulties or mental difficulties, even aggravated PMS symptoms for as one priest told me "The devil loves to hide behind other things..." - these may be indications. Consult a priest.

    A very good resource by a very holy priest I know, Fr Joseph Kane, is "Your Light Shines in My Darkness" - it explains very thoroughly the things that can happen, doors that are opened, remedies. There are only a few copies out there, but you can purchase a used copy at Amazon.com, at least for a little while
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  5. Great, I'll get the book. I do have depression sometimes. Not too bad but it's like an undercurrent in my life at different times.

    Used to experience significant jealousy in relationships. Went on anti-depressants for awhile and the amazing thing is that the jealousy disappeared within a couple of weeks, never to return! What a complete relief. Made me feel less like a freak when I realized there was a physical reason for it. Anyway, perhaps it's time to go on anti-depressants again. Hoping for an alternative though because I'm hoping to get pregnant.

    I've often wondered if the depression is actually the result of adolescent sins, a few of which harmed other people. Guilt!? Maybe I just can't forgive myself. I've confessed those sins but they still haunt me.

    I don't recall ever confessing the seance thing. At the time it seemed like no big deal and I never thought of it as being open to the devil. Seemed harmless but maybe it wasn't. I'll mention it next time I'm at confession and see what Father says.

    I'm on the west coast. I don't suppose you've heard of a priest out this way who's experienced in deliverance prayer?

    Thank you.
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  6. Hello! A book that is SO helpful for all of the issues you are discussing here is "Unbound" by Neal Lozano. I cannot recommend it enough. His website is www.heartofthefather.com if you would like to research it. It is Catholic and in line with Church teaching. It has helped me immensely!
    God Bless you all.
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  7. Remember too, the heart of the power of God is accessed through the sacraments. Receiving the Eucharist and receiving counsel and blessings from priests rank top priority in means to achieve healing in our lives.
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  8. Another gentle suggestion for anonymous –– we must work on forgiving ourselves. Pray for this…
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