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How Much Sports is Too Much Sports?
Dear Holly,
I am wondering what your take is on the sports issue. When our two oldest girls were young they played traveling soccer. After a few years of this I got a little smarter and saw how this was not good for the family to be running all the time. When they started high school we set a rule that they could play only two out of the three sport seasons. Well now my son is in high school and he wants to play three sports. After some persistence on his part I told him to write me a paper on why he thinks I should change the rule for him. He makes a good plea. He says that he needs to burn the energy. He feels that if he does not get the exercise that he needs, he tends to get irritable and not able to focus as well. He also feels that it is a good opportunity for him to evangelize to his class mates on the team by his good example. My husband thinks that we need to be able to change our rules according to where we are at and based upon the child. Of course he thinks we should let our son play the tree seasons of sports.
What do you think? To much sports or do I need to back off on this one?
Labels: 4th P Parent
posted by Holly at 3:08 PM
1 Comments:
I think you have a smart son! :-)
When all the kids are little, I am one of those who do believe in limiting team sports, where the family is scattered in 5 different directions and there is little family time left.
In order to cope with this, one summer we decided to focus on the development of family sports, or activities where the whole family can attend is a real bonus - group biking or hiking or a back yard swimming pool helped relieve us of "too many kids on too many teams". We enjoyed our summer, even tho the kids still missed the soccer. However, we had the children join in and choose this with us, so no one felt put upon.
But I also must say, this also depends upon the family charism. I have seen whole families attend the soccer game of one child and hang out at the tournament all day as a family. If this appeals, then go for it, as the whole family can benefit and stay together - almost like partaking in a hobby! But this is not for all, and in our family, such group-sitting-and-watching-games was not a treasured activity.
Now, when we get to older children - teens - I have a bit of a different opinion.
I have seen the real benefit of team sports in my daughter's life - it rounds out her education, gets and keeps her in shape, assists in her social formation and is generally a preferred option to sitting at the computer or hanging out at a mall or getting into trouble doing drugs with a local group of do-nothing teens.
For my son, at almost 15, he has not done the team sports yet, but is a daily visitor in the evening to the gym - and I agree: the exercise helps him burn his limitless teenage-boy energy! It keeps him healthy and happy, instead of restless; It occupies him in a healthy way and works against idleness. and he just plain enjoys it. And he usually now has a family member join him.
By the time a child gets ot be 14 or 16 or 18, then they are young adults and a few short years away from moving out on their own. I see sports and gym work as a healthy habit to develop - much better than hanging out on street corners or shopping for lack of anything else to do.
I beleive the habits we foster now will carry over into their regular life, and that it is a bonus.
They are so close to adulthood, that to participate in the life of an adult now - to begin to face their independence and self-determination, and to doit in a healthy way - I see all this as not only good, but as necessary.
So I agree with your son and your husband and consider that sports - one team per term - is a bonus to your efforts to raising him as a healthy responsible boy. Teenage male energy has go to be released and a sports team, at this mature age, is a perfect option, in my opinion.
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