The Mature Response vs the Emotional Reaction...
"Look at the word responsibility - "response-ability" - the ability to choose your response. Highly proactive people... do not blame circumstances, conditions or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling... The ability to subordinate an impulse to a value is the essence of the proactive person. Reactive people are driven by feelings, by circumstances, by conditions, by their environment. Proactive people are driven by values - carefully thought about, selected and internalized values."
Stephen R. Covey, in "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Restoring the Character Ethic", Simon and Schuster Publishers, NY, 1989, p71-72
posted by Holly at 6:51 PM





3 Comments:
There can be so many reasons why living our vocations out fully seems to be impossible - but the main reason is simply that we choose to follow or to ignore the mission God has placed in our hands.
Dr Covey is hitting on a very strong point here. We can be reactive - allowing our family life to 'make us feel' overwhelmed or burdened or down - or we can 'decide' how we are going to live our family life, and begin to make the conscious decisions which will bring about a healthy and happy family life.
We have the power - granted to us by God as the main characteristic of our humanity - free will.
In the middle - in between - every circumstance in our lives and every heart's intitial reaction, ought to be a quiet reflection of the intellect and a conscious decision about which path we plan to take in any given circumstance.
We have the power - both inherent in our free will, to do the good and choose what is best, as well as the power of God's grace to assist us. But our free and conscious choice to do God's Will in our lives is the 'light switch' which activates God's grace.
Let's stop 'reacting' today and start 'responding' to life - intelligently, thoughtfully, freely, decisively choosing the 'good'.
Excellent Holly, thank you. I am a stay at home mom, married for 16 years and have 6 children ages 4-14. Your post hits close to home for me as I look over the past 16 years at my vocation of wife and mother. Our path to heavan, as we are told, is narrow and steep. I have found great strength from our Blessed Mother. As a woman, I turn my heart to Mary's Immaculate heart and say WWMD? (What Would Mary Do?) Meditating on her Fiat. On our Mother's gentle, humble spirit that we can only imagine that She protrayed in Nazereth. Our Mother's peacefullness in the midst of daily struggle just to survive on the Holy Families meager pocessions, illness that mystics say St. Joseph struggled with. Ponderings in Her heart about her dear Son, Jesus.... At a retreat recently, I heard a speaker talk about Mary having to discover God's Will moment to moment, day to day, just like we do. Mary was without sin, yet she pondered things in heart. She had fears and concerns. God did not show her everything. Just bits and pieces like He does to us. Mary had to surrender and to trust. What a powerful intercesor we have. Those moments that we feel burdened, overwhelmed or fearful for the souls of our children, uniting with Mary at these moments is so powerful. We are so weak. Mary gently leads us through the thorns that we all encounter. She helps us along our path to Her dear, dear Son, Jesus. Blessings Holly+
Yes - Mary is our aid and our model!
If we can find the 'space' in between what happens to us and our response - and in that space, examine Mary as our model and guide in deciding how to respond - we have hit the proper space interiorly to live our vocations well.
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