Help
With Your Rule
Kids Have Lost Self-Initiative
Dear Holly,
I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your book and recommend it to all my friends. When you wrote about the 5 Ps it opened up a whole new world of understanding for me. I realized that I spend way too much time on the 5th P. However, since reading your book (in May) I have been making slow but steady progress in prioritizing my activities, especially regarding the first P.
This is my problem. I followed a schedule (not quite with the spirit of a rule) during our homeschool year; since school ended in June I have had a difficult time following a rule, and my four children (8, 6, 3 & 10 months) have wide areas of free time. I have never had a problem with my children knowing what to do with themselves but it seems I do now. I am concerned that because we were so scheduled they don't know how to use their time without my constant guidance. This is particularly true of my 3 year old. But, I am concerned that they all seem a little lost with all the free time. How can I gently encourage them to entertain and explore on their own? Should I have some scheduled activities? I would appreciate your wisdom in this area.
Labels: 4th P Parent, Homeschooling
posted by Holly at 10:52 AM
4 Comments:
A number of things have struck me about your post.
First off, when summer comes, I think it is natural to find schedules difficult. There has to be some time to rest and recreate after a long hard year of work. So I would suggest to you to keep your meals/chores and prayer routines (as these have to be done every day anyway), and look for ways to refresh during the other times. Day trips or visits or putzing around the house or a good vacation away are good things.
Secondly, while all of us here go through a period of shut down once school stops, when we have recuperated(!), I usually have some things for the children still. I go to the dollar store and purchase a pile of coloring activities, little crafts, little games - and I usually have a 'table time' of half an hour for the little ones every morning - just that little something to break up free time and give them something to work on. Getting a small pool, setting up some toys outside - I think it is important to still 'provide' something for them to do every day - just not schedule them to the hilt.
Thirdly, I would be looking at your rule for the school year time too - if you are so scheduled that the kids have no time for self-initiative, I would suggest backing off and giving them more time during the year. We don't want them to lose this - although , as I said, a certain amount of 'burn out' might be evidenced after school stops. I'd just make sure that the TV is off for a couple of weeks, and have lots of stuff around which only comes out in the summer - like bikes, or beach balls, or whatever - so they have the 'time' to let the imagination work...
Hope this helps!
Well, I might have just found your answer to keeping self-initiative with the children...
I picked up a book from a friend of mine - "Natural Structure" by Edward and Nancy Walsh - discussing a Montessori approach to learning, and I have to tell you, I am finding it tremendously inspiring -
Not their particular 'curriculum' per se, but the notion of providing a wealth of activities for the children - from academics to guitar songs to learn to art to sewing to anything - in trays for little ones or folder activities for older ones - and permitting the children to choose freely when and what, from the various weekly choices you give, they wish to work on - in their order, their time frame, their way...
It is an excellent idea for permitting true 'freedom within limits' which I discussed in MROL - as Montessori supposedly said - 'freedom to choose within the limits of what is good'...
You can look at this reference on the CHC website or order the book from them. I certainly recommend it for the ideas it will give you about how to arrange your 'school time' (ie: 'life' time) with your family, so that there will be no lacking of self-initiative and independent work, all the while accomplishing what you are looking for re outcomes.
If you do order it, and read it, get back to me. I am inspired with a whole new vision for our homeschool.
God Bless
Holly
Dear Holly,
Thank you so much for your time. I found a free sample of chapter three from "Natural Structure" and I was thoroughly inspired and humbled. I think the book will address my most pressing concerns and I plan to order it today.
I hope you will let us know what else you come across from the Montessori perspective. I already have a copy of "The Mass Explained to Children" and my goal is to read 3 or 4 pages three-five days a week. I have thumbed through it and one thing that strikes me about the book is her respect for the child's intellect.
I love to see how the Lord works; I received an e-mail from the Well Trained Mind Grammar Stage Group today, and it was a link to a sight with Montessori activities. I am so thankful when He brings things into my life that affirm a new direction. Thanks for being one of those gifts.
Actually, I am presently reading her book "Spontaneous Activity in Education" which has a totally scathing assessment of schools - I'm only on chapter three - but her careful attention to the legitimate rights and nature and dignity of the child makes modern schooling methods seem almost ludicrous, if not an abuse of power! I am about to read about her contributions to the natural education of the child in the following chapters- which I assume has many positive insights. I'll try to keep you posted!
God Bless
Holly
Holly
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