Help
With Your Rule
How Often to Get to Mass?
Dear Holly,
I'm not sure where to begin... After years of living in chaos, I started bringing my boys to daily Mass 7 days a week. After several months of that, other circumstances led us to cut way back on that, focusing instead on the family & Domestic Church, etc. When my youngest developed some health issues that were taking up a pretty good chunk of time, things started to go a little crazy again.
Last year, after reading your book, I put together a Mother's Rule for myself & our homeschooling life but then hit a wall when myself & my children all went through illnesses this past winter for literally 2 months where we were barely getting the basics done (and sometimes not even the basics!). Now that we have mostly recovered from that, we are approaching the end of the homeschool year, Spring Fever is running rampant, I have tweaked my Mother's Rule but still am having troubles implementing it.
One of my biggest issues is knowing how often is reasonable for us to get to daily Mass amidst spur of the moment doctor appointments that need to be made and various other needs which arise. Things have been so busy here lately that we ended up not getting to daily Mass at all this week and barely getting all the essential errands done...and I haven't even tackled grocery shopping for the week. Any advice???
Labels: 1st P Prayer
posted by Holly at 1:39 PM
1 Comments:
Sounds a bit hectic! :-)
A few years ago, I knew Mass was important, but I still often felt it conflicted with the other things I had to do. I felt it took time away from my homeschooling day, making it so I couldn't get all my studies with the children done by noon. So, basically I found it kind of 'inconvenient'. In this respect, my reasons for not going daily were a bit skewed.
On the other hand, when my children were littler, I found it very difficult to go to daily Mass with them - I would be holding a baby, settling a toddler, and trying to keep pre-schoolers quiet and still! For me, this caused me stress, and I would often leave Mass less recollected than I entered! I found this circumstance something I was not able to reasonably tackle every single day.
Now, with all my children older (ages 5-14), we can easily go to Mass every day, but it's still only offered here 3 mornings a week in addition to Sunday. I would find it easier to go daily because once the routine is set, it's easier than having things change from day to day.
So, I guess it is up to you to decide what you and your family can 'handle'. Are there circumstances that make daily Mass an 'un-reasonable' option for you at this time, as a set norm? There is no sin or lack of fervor in a mother not being able to get to Mass daily because her other responsibilities point in another direction.
Or is there really nothing that interferes with the ability to go daily? Are you able to set a certain day or couple of days where you know you will go - like Monday and Friday - and then stick to that?
Also, when we have circumstances come up which prevent us from getting to Mass - like if I am babysitting extra children that day, or someone has to go to an appointment I couldn't book for another time, or we're sick or the weather is impossible - I know that there is not anything 'wrong' with this. There are 'exceptions' to the rule - and I treat them as God's Will for the day. When things calm down, I just continue as normal.
Although, I now experience a bit of sorrow about not getting to Mass on these days - I have noticed such fruit and strength in my life on our Mass days. I tend to suffer a lack of steam on our non-Mass days.
I have noticed my children's faith life growing due to the tremendous graces of the Eucharist - with Holy Communion, I permit Jesus to step in and do His Work directly - I am no longer 'alone' throughout the day in trying to lead them to Christ.
The additional example of the priest speaking about God and teaching them has also been a tremendous boon to our family - it's not 'just Mummy' saying it. They see a grown man and an inspiring model teaching them about a closer walk with God. Wow!
And they have a chance to get out of the house, to worship with a community, and to receive their God. The Mass is the most important activity any one of us could ever do on this earth - so for me, I think placing it in top spot in our lives is essential.
So, if there is any way to work it out so you can go daily, or as often as possible on certain set days, you and each of your children will benefit . If you can't, just do your best and leave it in God's hands.
Lastly, since it seems you have not been able to implement your rule to your liking, perhaps you need to enlist the help of a good friend with an organizing bent - who would be able to help you figure out your essential prayer, meals, housework routines so that these could become a constant. Then, you'd be able to handle everything else as it comes along.
Keep in touch!
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