Help
With Your Rule
Understanding How to Love
"What I am can only be received by the other who gives me his full attention, who is present to me and becomes aware of what I am, and that I am good and worthwhile. The other who wills his awareness of me opens his consciousness to my being, and comes to know, that is, possess my goodness. His evident finding delight in my goodness will be perceived by me. I am revealed to myself as good. I have received from the other what I am. I am no longer alone... a truly affirming parent [or spouse] is one who, when reasonably possible, drops everything in order to let [the other] unburden himself or ask questions while giving him his concentrated attention before advising him..."
Catholic Psychiatrist Conrad Baars, M.D., in "Born Only Once", Illinois, Franciscan Press, Quincy University, 2001, pp 28, 39
posted by Holly at 8:49 PM
1 Comments:
The heart of our mother's rule is relationship. How can we love our husbands and our children so that they truly know it?
By giving them the gift our our attention - complete and undivided - and the gift of our complete acceptance of their person - where we know they are 'good', and they FEEL it. This is, in fact, the "education of the heart" we as parents are called to give our children.
People have often remarked about the extraordinary sense of being the 'only person in the world' when they met Pope John Paul II. Why? Because JPII knew how to love. He paid complete attention to each person he met at any given moment, and his time was often brief. Yet people walked away feeling loved and appreciated.
This is our call as wives and moms. Our family needs to know they are good and loveable and welcome in our lives and in our hearts. This is perhaps the most important gift we can give to them.
JPII's last message to the faithful, composed on his deathbed was "It is love which converts hearts and gives peace to all humanity, which today seems so lost and dominated by the power of evil selfishness and fear: our resurrected Lord gives us his love, which forgives, reconciles and reopens the soul to hope."
But most importantly, JPII loved people because He knew He was loved - by God. In order for us to become channels of this love which affirms people, we as mothers need to realize - GOD FEELS THIS WAY ABOUT US TOO!
God has time for us - this is why we go to prayer - and He gives us His undivided attention. He loves us - this is why He sent His Son to die for us. He thinks we are good - this is why He wants us with Him.
If we experience the love of God for us personally, we will most certainly be able to channel this loving acceptance to our husband and children. But if we don't experience the love of God, we will pass on our own woundedness to our families.
Wanna experience God? Wanna feel loved? Tell Him, sincerely, from the bottom of your heart in bed tonight - "Jesus, I hear you love me. I need you to show me this - first, so that I can get to know you better, and secondly so that I can love my family the way you want me to."
And then keep your heart open for the next few of weeks...
Post a Comment
<< Home