Help
With Your Rule
When Husband Isn't Supportive
Dear Holly
My husband isn't really supportive of my making up a rule. He doesn't want our family to be 'regimented' and feels that I will just stress myself out. What do you think of this?
Labels: 3rd P Partner
posted by Holly at 9:03 AM
3 Comments:
Husbands have their own issues, just like wives do. Something about schedules and perhaps even a stronger intent on the part of his wife to move closer to God may be threatening. While I would strongly suggest discussing this thoroughly, and trying to find out the root cause of his reluctance, you may in fact never know.
However, Moms are still persons, responsible for our own lives, and have to make decisions for ourselves and the good of the children as well. If I am called to more order in my spiritual and practical life, in reality, my husband has no right to prevent me from doing this. It would be the same thing as a man trying to stop his wife from practicing her faith.
I truly think that if you go about making your rule slowly and quietly, truly giving your husband his proper place in your priorities, and not trying to get him to 'adopt it' too -- that the benefits of order and peace in the home will be attractive enough for him to change his mind.
Take into account his concerns for being 'regimented' and guard against it- for really, we don't want this either, do we? And implement your rule slowly enough that it will not cause you stress. Let him see instead the peace and interior quiet that your rule can produce. There is no greater endorsement of a Mother's rule than this.
I fully agree. I don't know too my husbands who aren't pleased to come home to happy kids, happy mom, and orderly peaceful home. Knowing this helps me to stay motivated on those days when I am feeling tired or sluggish. Maintaining my priorities is good for me but it is also a way that I show love for my husband by having my work done so I can be free when he is home and by creating an orderly home for our kids so we can truly enjoy our family time.
Perhaps being extremely flexible in the evenings when your husband is home would help. Think of it this way... would you tell your husband how to run HIS day on his job? What would he think of that? Perhaps you can explain it that way... that homemaking and child raising is YOUR job and you need to do it in the way that makes most sense to you.
Leslie
mom of 8
Post a Comment
<< Home